Hold on to your hats, sports fans! This is it! The adventure of a lifetime!
I awoke on recent Sunday morning—a normal every day Sunday morning—a light mist hugged low to the ground as the sun warmed the damp grass and foliage in the back yard and nearby hillside. The Sunday paper was already resting in the driveway, the dogs tussled playfully with each other and a blue bird serenaded me at the back window. I guess it was a blue bird. Hell, I don’t know. I didn’t see it. I can’t really remember if there were actually any birds in the back yard or where the dogs were. I’m just trying to set a tone here. Jeez! It was a Sunday morning like hundreds before it, OK?
Shuffling with my cup of coffee to my computer I settled in to do a quick check of my email. It’s usually pretty light on Sunday mornings. I Followed and Followed-back a few new friends on Twitter, then popped in on Facebook to see what my peeps were up to on this beautiful Southern California morning. It was at that moment that my then-girlfriend approached me with a plan for the day.
“Honey?”
“Mm hmm?”
“Susie texted that the Road to California, Best in the West, Quilter’s Conference and Showcase is in its last day at the Ontario Convention Center. Would you like to go with us?”
I stared at my monitor for a long moment. “I’m sorry, sweetheart, what?”
“A quilters’ convention. At the convention center. We go each year.”
She and I had met a year and a week prior to that day. We started dating a month later so I must have just missed this event in her annual calendar.
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“A quilters’ convention?”
“Uh huh.”
“Where they… they uhhh… I’m sorry, Love, what?”
“It’s people who make quilts. They come from all over the country and they travel around to various locations and network and show their quilts and enter them and win prize money.”
“I see.”
“You know that Susie quilts, so she goes to see what’s new with the vendors and I go to see the quilts.”
“Quilts.”
“Yes.”
“Quilts like you cover up to get warm?”
“Well, yes, but these are show pieces and they’re works of art.”
“Quilts?”
“Yes.”
“With little squares of material? Like my grandmother made?”
“They’ve gotten a lot more sophisticated since those days.”
“I see. And you’re inviting me to go look at these quilts with you?”
“You don’t have to go.”
“No. Of course. I want to go, but I was thinking of staying home today and repeatedly thrusting my tongue into the ceiling fan… So, you can see my dilemma…”
“I said you don’t have to go!” She turned and left me at my computer.
Whew! Dodged that one!
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Of course, she left in a huff and that would mean she’d be pissed at me for the rest of the day. Maybe a few. You know how it is. They slam things around and answer you in one-word sentences for a few days, all the while insisting that nothing is wrong? And then I pondered the idea of a bunch of people who go to quilting conventions. I had no idea that something like that existed and became curious. Why not go to a quilters’ convention and see how the other half lives?
I followed her back down the hall and told her I’d go. It only took another fifteen minutes to convinced her I wasn’t kidding.
We picked up Susie and drove to the convention center; all the while my girlfriend eying me suspiciously.
Getting out of the car she said to me, “Don’t you want to bring your sweater?”
“Nah. If I get cold I’ll just borrow a quilt.” She raised a warning finger at me. “I’m just kidding!”
Arriving at the main entrance I discovered there was a ten dollar entry fee.
“Shouldn’t they be paying me ten bucks to look at quilts?”
She again raised a finger.
We put on our all access wrist bands and made our way through the front doors. Through those front doors to partake in the adrenaline-laced, mile-a-minute thrill ride that is a quilters’ convention. The excitement! The exhilaration! The unbridled joy, ecstasy and adventure! And we had all access passes! We wouldn’t miss a thing!
As we approached the main floor, my senses were ablaze with the enchantment, elation and anticipation that accompanies any explorer into a new world! My heart pounded with unrestrained eagerness, enthusiasm and 
expectancy at my voyage into the realm of quilters! My spirits soared! With a zeal and fervor, an eagerness never before experienced resonated within my cells; my mind buzzed in a frenzied stupor of delight! The Road to California, Best in the West, Quilter’s Conference and Showcase unfurled itself 
before me in all its rapturous glory and I was about to immerse myself therein! Be still my quickening senses! How does one prepare oneself for the awe inspiring splendor, majesty and frenzied excitement of quilts hanging on convention center dividers?! There was row upon row of quilts hanging on convention center dividers. It was awe-inspiring! Row upon row of quilts hanging on convention center dividers! The frenzy! The fury! Metal poles, draped with curtains and, on them, quilts! The thrills, chills and electric mayhem of quilts! Hanging there! Just… hanging! I was Sir Edmund Hillary at the foot of Everest, Mario Andretti on the pace lap, Neil Armstrong taking control of the Eagle!
Quilts!
Hanging there!
Actually, it was kind of cool.
Seriously.
I’d decided to go to see something new; something I’d never go by myself to discover. And, to tell you the truth, some of those quilts were amazing. My paternal grandmother had been a quilter. I remember her showing me the frame she and her friends used to make quilts. She showed me the squares of materials they used and explained how, while the men were out drinking beer under the guise barbequing, the women stitched together the squares into a progressively growing quilt. I thought it was pretty cool, but these quilts at the show demonstrated that quilting had come a long way.
The quilts that hung before us that day were indeed works of art. Susie had gone off to peruse the vendors and my girlfriend and I walked the aisles. I readily admired the quilts that each artist had brought to life. With the passing eons and countless artists through the ages, I am always amazed that unique art can still be created. I mean, hasn’t it all been done? No. Each artist has a vision and these quilt artists expressed theirs in cloth and thread.
As we strolled the lanes, my girlfriend began pointing out various quilting techniques. She named the techniques and explained them to me, each adding further to my enjoyment and downright amazement of the craft.
This show awarded cash prizes in various categories as well as many different competitions. I saw one that won $1,000 and thought that was pretty cool. Then in the notes I noticed that it took the quilter five years to complete. Five years! But when I remembered that two-hundred bucks a year is more than I make now, it seemed pretty good!
Anyway, we spent a few hours looking at the quilts (art!) and I enjoyed every minute. I know I will take some crap from my friends for, first of all, going to a quilt show, and next for publicly admitting it. But it was pretty cool.
🙂